


In the Shadows

by CSDeckerx



Category: Lucifer (TV)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Heartbreak, Heavy Angst, Hurt/Comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-13
Updated: 2019-09-13
Packaged: 2020-10-17 11:36:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,442
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20620388
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CSDeckerx/pseuds/CSDeckerx
Summary: He watched her life go by from the shadows. Close enough for him to see every flicker of emotion on her beautiful face but far enough away that she would never know he was there.





	In the Shadows

**Author's Note:**

> This is grade A: Depression I'm just warning you

He watched her life go by from the shadows. Close enough for him to see every flicker of emotion on her beautiful face but far enough away that she would never know he was there.  
  
It was after 2 years In hell that he couldn't do it anymore, he had to see her. Lucifer knew that was selfish of him but he just needed to see one more eye roll or one more headshake, one more genuine smile.  
  
That's when he went topside, he flew into a secure corner of the precinct without one soul noticing. An Angel's ability to shield oneself from the human eye coming in handy.  
  
Then he saw her. Her frame looked smaller like she hadn't been eating properly, her eyes looked sorrowful and the bags under them were heavy. His heart lurched at the thought he had caused this. How long had it been for her? No more than 2 months he theorized.  
  
He just needed to touch her, to be held by her for a second. She was the only one who could make him feel peace, even for a moment. His feet started to carry him forward out his hiding space until a familiar douchey figure appeared at Chloe's side. He looked concerned for her too. Whatever they were talking about was getting Chloe agitated if the tick in her jaw or the stressful pulling of her hair was any indication.  
  
"I know Dan! I'm trying to move on okay?!" She shouts at her ex husband, before looking around the precinct sheepishly, standing abruptly and leaving.  
  
Look at what you have done to her, he thinks to himself. She would have been better without you in her life.  
  
He pressed himself back into the shadows as she passed by, holding his breath. She seemed to stall in her retreat for a moment, like she sensed him but surely that was impossible.  
  
She carried on with a shake of her head and left.  
  
Lucifer truly had to force himself to not follow after her. She was trying to move on, she had said so herself. So he should let her. He couldn't be so cruel to invade into her life at brief intervals in the span of it. It was unfair. She deserved a happy life without him burdening her.  
  
  
That was when he swore he would never show himself to her throughout his visits.  
  
And he stuck to his word. Everytime he took the briefest moment away from hell, he went to see her. He watched her start to slowly heal. He saw her change her hair, witnessed her cry as Lux was eventually sold off, watched her leave Linda's office, everytime seemingly lighter in spirit. He watched her beam with pride as Trixie graduated, watched her smile at the man next to her as she took his hand.  
  
It broke his heart to know he never got the chance to be the man. But he couldn't fault her for moving on. It had been 8 years after all for her. She was only a human, she had such a short life span, she had to live her life to the fullest without being stuck in the past. It's what he wanted after all. It didnt mean it didnt physically crush him.  
  
There were moments where he would watch her and it was like she subconsciously knew he was there. He thinks this because sometimes she would talk to the thin air, to him.  
  
"I hope you're okay."  
I hope you're not suffering."  
"I miss you." Were among the main ones. She said them less and less as the years went by but when she did, it filled his haunted soul with a moment of joy.  
  
He watched her cry with happiness as she held her first grandchild in her arms, her hair had silver to it now but she still took his breath away. He doubted that would ever change.  
  
He watched her live her life, she loved and was loved in return, and that was what he always took back with him when the days down In his domain were almost too much to handle. It had been centuries for him now and his love for her never dwindled. He wasnt sure if that was a gift or a punishment anymore.  
  
  
The second to last time he went to visit her, he found her at a distinctly familiar place, the ocean waves crashing against the shore as she looks out towards the horizon.  
  
She was old now, the silver beginnings I'm her hair had turned completely white, there were wrinkles to show a life well lived and wisdom in her blue eyes. She sat on the sand, a hint of a smile on her lips. Imagining a time long gone but still attached to her heart.  
  
  
It was after he returned that he realised why the place had been so familiar. It was the same beach they shared their first kiss.  
  
He knew deep down this next visit was different, he could feel it in his heart. As if this was the day he was going to lose the light he had been holding onto.  
  
He was right. Chloe lay in her own bed, surrounded by her family and remaining friends as they said their goodbyes. Chloe was still there, she said farewell to them with a content smile on her face, she was ready.  
  
He felt his breathing escalate. The time had finally come, he was never going to see her again. He was going to leave, return to hell and never come back because what would be the point. But something stopped him.  
  
It was his selfishness. It was his desire to talk to her one more time before it's too late. If this was the last time he would ever see her then he believed he was owed this courtesy right?  
  
Once the room is emptied and just him and an unaware Chloe remain, he steps forward into the light, allowing his shield to drop so she could see him.  
  
She turns to the noise he makes as he approaches the foot of the bed.  
  
"Lucifer." She breathes out, like she had been waiting her whole life to say his name again.  
  
"Detective." He greets her, fists clenching to try to reign in his emotions. She looked so weak right now, brittle and breakable but no less perfect.  
  
"I havent been a Detective for almost 20 years now." She chuckles, coughing afterwards with a harsh breath.  
  
"You'll always be my Detective." He tells her and she smiles so softly it nearly breaks him apart.  
  
"Hmmm but not the most glamorous anymore." She jokes again but even after years or centuries apart he can tell when she is being insecure with herself.  
  
He reaches out his hand to touch her own, squeezing it gently as they lock eyes. Blue on brown, as if nothing had changed.  
  
"Chloe, you are beautiful. Nothing will change that" He brushes a strand of hair back over her ear and her eyes glistened.  
  
"I missed you."  
  
"The feeling has been mutual." He smirks without humour, because the pain he had felt, the pain he wouldnt let himself feel properly as he watched her moved on with her life without him, it all came rushing forward, moisture forming in the corner of his eyes.  
  
She smiles, but it's barely there, her eyes become heavy and her breathing irregular. He could feel the tether of soul and body tearing. He caught it before it did, knowing it had to be him who did this.  
  
"It's time to take you where you belong." He whispers into the form her soul had taken. She looks just like she did the night he left her on the balcony all those centuries ago.  
  
He spreads his wings and flies upwards, holding onto her soul tightly, as if it was the most precious thing in existence. To him it very well was.  
  
He takes her to the gates were one of his brothers meets him. They make eye contact and his brother shakes his head solemnly. He expected nothing else.  
  
Lucifer brings his lips to her forehead, squeezing his eyes shut as tears fall onto her face.  
  
"Goodbye my love." He whispers before handing her to his brother carefully who takes her beyond the gate and to those she was going to be reunited with. Just not him.  
  
  
Lucifer went back to hell, to rule for the rest of eternity. He never stepped foot on earth again. There was no point. His home wasnt there anymore. She was somewhere he could never follow.  
  



End file.
